My Husband Knows Best?

Scott,

My husband is wanting to create a self-managed superannuation fund, and wants to put 80% of this into the stock market into high-risk assets that are US listed, with high volatility, mostly tech and crypto correlated. My husband and I have never put money into the stockmarket and do not know much about it, other than what my husband is learning from the people encouraging this. They are even suggesting which assets to invest in. They are promising that he will be able to create ‘intergenerational wealth’ through doing this, which has him excited. My husband and I have no savings, and have not put enough time and energy into planning our future financially. We are both in our late 40s. I am trying to convince my husband that we need to seek independent financial advice before we make a big mistake. I feel sick. Please help!

Zara

Zara,

You know that line, trust your gut?

Your gut is working perfectly.

The people “encouraging” your husband to invest your life savings, and “suggesting which assets to buy” are salespeople (at best) or scammers (at worst). Financial experts don’t promise “intergenerational wealth” to people with no savings and no investment experience. Spruikers do.

Here’s what’s actually being proposed: two people in their late 40s, no savings, no investment experience, hand their retirement money to a self-managed fund and punt most of it on high-volatility offshore crypto-correlated tech stocks. Based on the advice of weirdos on the internet.

Is your tummy rumbling?

Mine sure is!

Your husband isn’t stupid. He’s had his greed gland rubbed by people who are very good at making this sound exciting and easy.

So here’s what I want you to do. Show him this column. Then show him the ASIC MoneySmart website and look up the people who are “encouraging” him. If they’re not licensed to give financial advice in Australia, they cannot legally tell him what to buy. Full stop.

You are not trying to kill his dreams. You are trying to save his retirement.

So am I.

Are we heading into a recession?

Hi Scott,

I am really scared about where interest rates are heading. My husband and I bought a $780,000 ‘fixer-upper’ last year not too far from where you live! We took a pay cut to do the tree change but we have been hit with successive rate rises. Now I am reading that the government is predicting that inflation will go to 5%. We could be hit with multiple interest rate rises this year, which could send us into recession. I am really worried. We can’t afford any more rate rises so should we fix our home loan now?

Ellie 

Ellie,

Good news: if the government is predicting inflation will hit 5%, they will almost certainly be wrong.

(They are wrong about most things.)

My standard suggestion is to find the cheapest variable home loan you can with an offset account, and go hammer and tongs at paying it down. This works whether rates go up or down. Get the banker off your back as fast as possible.

That said, it sounds like you’ve got a few too many undies swinging from the Hills Hoist. If you need certainty right now, talk to your lender about fixing part of your loan. Just know you’ll likely pay a premium for it.

Finally, are we heading into a recession?

Honestly, I have no idea.

But it sounds like you’re already experiencing one. 

Plan accordingly.

My brush with fame

We have a Japanese exchange student living with us.

She’s from Shibuya: home to the busiest pedestrian crossing on earth, surrounded by 10-storey singing billboards and 40 million things to do on a Tuesday afternoon.

She landed on our chestnut farm.

Population: us, and some very confused chestnuts.

For the first week, she was polite about it. 

By last weekend, she was craving the city. So we drove into Melbourne and, at her request, joined the annoyingly long queue at Lune croissants.

This is what Japanese people do. They queue. Joyfully. With the patience of a St Kilda supporter.

She paid $7 for a croissant, and ate it like it was the best thing that had ever happened to her.

I waited out the front wearing a Demons scarf and a look that said, “Hurry up, I want to get to the footy”.

And then a beautiful young woman approached me, phone in hand.

“Would you mind walking behind me?” she asked.

I just stared at her.

(Beautiful women do not stop me in the street and talk to me.)

“I’m an influencer”, she said matter-of-factly. “You look like a local. Just walk past me as I shoot my video, but keep it natural”, she directed.

So I did.

My kids were watching my performance from inside the bakery.

“Are you famous, Dad? You were just on a video!” my daughter said.

“Her Chanel handbag”, said Liz, “is worth more than your ute.”

I watched the influencer for a while after that.

She photographed her croissant from six angles. She laughed at things that weren’t funny. She looked stressed directing me … until the camera came on, at which point she looked like she was having a lune of a time.

She never took a bite … which, in hindsight, was the most honest thing about the whole production.

Back on the farm, every bill feels like it’s doubled. Fuel. Feed. Insurance. Even Lucky’s dog food is starting to look like a luxury item.

Our exchange student flew in from one of the most overwhelming cities on earth, rocked up to a bakery in Melbourne, paid $7, and had a genuine perfect moment.

She was just there. Munching on her croissant. In the sun.

The influencer was there too … kinda. She was performing. She wasn’t present. 

In this cost-of-living crisis, everyone’s telling you what to cut back on. I’d suggest the last thing you cut is the stuff that’s actually real. If you’re going to cut something, cut the fake stuff … 

Keep the croissant.

Tread Your Own Path!

Shiver Me Timbers

Hi Scott, 

I have a friend who offered to manage my superannuation for me. So I transferred all $173,000 from Australian Super to his SMSF. Long story short, he started trading with an overseas firm (Swipe Capital) and it was a scam. It’s all gone, plus around $50,000 of my savings I put in too. I’m really angry with my ‘friend’ who I thought knew what he was doing but traded with an unregulated company overseas. All my Google searches about this company say the same thing: ‘red flag’ or ‘scam alert’. Where do I stand in regard to the $223,000 I’ve lost – can the government do anything, or is it gone forever?

Lincoln

Lincoln,

Your super was with the equivalent of a Sydney ferry, large, boring, and packed with the public – and your mate stowed you both on board a pirate ship, with Captain Feathersword at the wheel. Shiver me timbers!  

Your mate walked you off the plank, but you do need to take some responsibility here, mate. You handed control of your super to a friend, and that’s where you got peg-legged. Aghh!

You could speak to a lawyer about whether your friend breached his duties as a trustee. But if he’s been looted too, then chasing him may cost more than you’ll ever recover. So by all means report it to ASIC and SCAMwatch, but do it knowing there’s a very good chance the money is gone.

They’ve stolen your money. Don’t let them take everything else with it. People who get scammed lose more than money. They lose their confidence, their peace of mind, and sometimes their will to keep going. Call IDCARE on 1800 595 160. Talk to someone who gets it.

Guard your mental health like treasure.

Travelling in a Time of War

Hi Scott,

With all the recent flight disruptions in the Middle East, I’ve realised how messy things get when something goes wrong. I booked through a third-party site, and now neither they nor the airline want to talk to me unless my flight is actually cancelled. Meanwhile, people who’ve had flights disrupted are being bounced back and forth between airlines, booking platforms and insurers. It’s made me wonder whether we’re taking more financial risk than we realise when we book flights. Is it better to book directly with the airline? Are flexible fares worth the extra money? And how do you protect yourself from losing thousands if things go sideways?

Bill

Hi Bill,

Yes, it’s a hell of a mess at the moment.

Here are three tips to make sure you don’t end up playing a prolonged game of call centre bingo.

First, don’t cancel your flight. Ever. Make the airline do it, or you hand away every right you have.

Second, book direct with the airline wherever you can. If the trip is more complicated, a good travel agent can help sort things out when it all goes sideways. But avoid the cheap third-party booking sites. That’s where people end up stuck in the great ‘not our problem’ loop.

Third, flexible fares are worth the extra money. Cheap flights are expensive when things go wrong. That's why these days I avoid the star jump deals on Onestar (Jetstar).

Finally, stop assuming your travel insurance will save you. Most policies exclude war and civil unrest. Read the terms and conditions before you buy it, not after your flight gets scrapped.

Money Is Ruining My Marriage

Scott,

I’m approaching my 10-year wedding anniversary and I regret the day I combined our bank accounts. Two months after our honeymoon I was pregnant, we’d bought a car on $20k finance and put a deposit on an off-the-plan home. Since then my ability to earn and spend has been stunted by raising kids and a husband who became obsessed with controlling all spending, with no regard for my needs.

I’m back to full-time work now, earning just under $100k. He earns $200–250k. We have a mortgage of $620k. Spending is lean. Yet I’m still being controlled when it comes to my own money. I’ve been honest with him about wanting to separate our finances. He needs help with his scarcity mentality and we need a third party before this ends in divorce. I feel trapped.

Sarah

Sarah,

Let me give you the key that will unlock the trap:

Open your own bank account today. Deposit your pay into it. You don’t need his permission.

You’re a 40-year-old woman earning $100,000 a year. You don’t need permission to spend your own money.

What you’re describing has a name: coercive control. It’s not a budgeting problem. It’s not a scarcity mentality problem. It’s a power problem. Yes, you need a marriage counsellor. But I want you to open that account before you even book the appointment.

Because here’s what I know after 22 years of reading letters like yours: women who take back control of their own money stop asking, and start deciding. They stand differently. They speak differently. And sometimes (not always, but sometimes) that shift changes everything around them too.

Maybe he comes with you. Maybe the counsellor helps him understand what he’s been doing. Maybe the marriage has a future. But none of that starts until you stop asking for permission.

If you need someone to talk to before you’re ready for counselling, call 1800 RESPECT (1800 737 722). They understand financial abuse better than most.

You already know what to do, Sarah.

You just haven’t given yourself permission yet.

You won’t like this

Warning:

There’s a good chance you’re going to hate what I’m about to write.

I’m okay with that.

This week I got an email from a bloke I’ll call Barry, who put the boots into me good and proper:

“I’m sick of your crap. You have no idea how hard it is for normal people like me. I’m 49 years old. Three kids. I earn $87,000 a year. We have an $800,000 home loan and the Reserve Bank is punishing us with higher rates. I can barely afford to fill my second-hand Mazda to get to work. Our groceries have gone up $100 a week. The game is rigged for people like me. Everyone is against us. Your buckets and compound interest only work if you have money to put in them. I’m not 18, I’m nearly 50. Wake up.”

(For the record, I don’t mind a bloke sticking the boots into me. I’ve built a career on it.)

I’ve pissed you off, haven’t I, Baz?

Good!

Come on, cobber. No one put a shovel to your head and forced you to take out an $800,000 loan.

And there was nothing in your wife’s tarot cards that said “Interest rates will never go up”.

Come to think of it, I’ve been saying this in my column for, well, years?

Now the easiest thing I could do right now is what every other finance commentator has done this week and point the angry stick at the heartless Reserve Bank, the record spending government, the greedy supermarkets and the gouging oil companies.

And yes, Barry, there is plenty to point at. But none of it will help you pay a single bill.

You still get to choose where your energy goes.

You can burn it on interest rates, petrol prices and grocery bills, all the stuff you can’t control. Or you can put it to work.

I am not saying you caused your situation.

I am saying you are responsible for what happens next.

You’re 49. You’re not dead, dude!

You’re old enough to know better – and still young enough to fix it.

You’ve got 15 years to turn this around. I reckon you can do it in 10:

I’d set up my Barefoot Buckets properly and get serious about filling them. Every extra dollar gets a job. That might mean selling stuff, taking on extra work, or doing the jobs you have been putting off – selling your kidney (or the cat) on Marketplace if you have to. Kidding. Probably.

And I would make a plan to earn more, starting now and over the next 10 years. You are not stuck. Plenty of people lift their income over time. It takes effort, a bit of strategy, and sticking at it longer than feels comfortable, but it is doable.

None of this fixes things overnight.

When we lost everything in a bushfire, the place was black. Burnt. It stank. It was overwhelming. So we planted an apple tree. Not because it fixed anything. It didn’t. But it was a start. You don’t fix a mess like that in a day.

You just start.

Then you show up again tomorrow.

Tread Your Own Path!

Kohler Ad is a Scam (and so are you)

Hi Scott,

My wife and I have followed the Barefoot Investor program for years. It got us out of a pit of debt and we've been debt-free ever since. I'm now happily retired. The other day I saw a 'news' article on social media quoting both you and Alan Kohler endorsing a new AI platform. Is this something you're involved in?

Reg

G'day Reg,

It's a scam.

The other day I rang Bushy – a bloke I know who does stonework – about a job at my place.

"Am I talking to the real Scott Pape?" he asked.

Huh?

"Because you and Alan Kohler are on my Facebook feed promoting crypto scams," he laughed.

Bushy wasn't wrong.

Scammers use AI to create fake news stories featuring well-known Australians (like me and Alan) supposedly revealing a "secret investment platform". The ads often look like an ABC article, complete with the logo and a fake interview on 7.30.

Click the link and things move fast.

Another reader this week told me she clicked one of these ads. Within seconds the phone rang. A friendly voice congratulated her for "getting in early" and asked for just $400 to start.

Then came the hook: all they needed was the 16 digits on her bank card.

Thankfully her husband overheard the conversation and said the magic words:

"Hang on… is this a scam?"

She hung up. Good move. Because if you hand over those details, the scammers won't just take $400. They'll take everything they can.

For the record, I do not run secret crypto trading platforms. Neither does Alan Kohler.

And if you ever see an ad online claiming we do, there's only one thing you should do.

Don't click.

The Iran War is Killing My Retirement

Hi Scott,

I am very stressed about the Iran war, and the impact it will have on my superannuation. I am 61, still working, and looking to retire in the next four years. Therefore I check my Australiansuper balance if not daily, every second day! I spent the last 60 years not giving a cuckoo about the share market, and now it keeps me up at night. Experts are suggesting that this is the start of something much bigger. I am thinking of moving my super to cash until this blows over. It would help me sleep at night.

Yasmine

Hi Yasmine,

You wrote: "I spent the last 60 years not giving a cuckoo about the share market."

That might actually be the smartest investing strategy I've ever heard.

Because when retirement is four years away, every wobble in the market suddenly feels personal. It's like waking up an hour before your alarm. Every creak in the house suddenly sounds like a burglar.

On Monday, as I was sipping my coffee, I read this headline:

"More than $100 billion was wiped off the ASX in less than an hour in a horror morning for Australian investors."

I actually love these headlines, because they are just so… thirsty.

Let's decode it:

"$100 billion wiped off" (seems like a lot)

"in less than an hour" (seems quick)

So was it a horror morning for Australian investors?

Nah.

Another way of writing that headline is:

"Sharemarket down to levels not seen since… Christmas."

Even accounting for Iran and the $100 billion wipe out, over the last year  the sharemarket has delivered a 14% return, when you factor in dividends (which you should).

Ho! Ho! Ho!

So I have some advice for you to get more sleep.

First, stop checking your super balance every week. It's like planting an apple tree … and then checking on it each morning and wondering whether you should pull it out and replant it somewhere sunnier in your garden.

Second, build up a cash buffer within your super fund. Money you can live off when you retire. Book in to see a financial adviser at AustralianSuper. 

Something like three years of living expenses is a good number.

Sleep well.

I am in tears as I write this

Scott,

I am in tears as I write this. I'm 43 and a qualified nurse. My husband is a lawyer. We own our home and two investment properties. We are asset rich, cash poor, mortgaged to the hilt. I need dental treatment. Implants are just the start. It will cost upward of $30,000. I'm a nurse, and I fully understand the impact bad teeth have on your health. Not to mention embarrassing, and at times painful. I've put my kids first and my health last. So here I am. 

The investment properties cover their own costs, but that's it. Both have gone up significantly in value, but the bank won't let us refinance. We don't want to sell either. We'd lose half in capital gains. Our primary mortgage is $7,000 a month. Childcare $3,000. We don't have fancy cars. I shop at Kmart. There's nothing left. So do I dip into my super (I have $416K)? Fly to Thailand? What should I do? Don’t just say ‘nothing’.

Sue

Hey Sue,

Seems like you’ve spent your entire adult life dismissing yourself and your needs — so I sure as hell ain’t going to do that. You’re not talking about getting flashy veneers for Instagram, but treating a genuine health concern that will have real ramifications for you as you get older.

Stop asking for permission. You’re a grown woman. There is no question you need to get this done — the only question is how to pay for it sensibly. And sensibly rules out super. Taking $30k today could easily be $200k at retirement.

So that’s a hard no.

What about flying to Thailand? 

If I were in your shoes I wouldn’t do it. Yes it may be cheaper, but if something fails, fixing it here could end up costing more than doing it locally.

Let me pick at something you wrote:

“I've put my kids first and my health last. So here I am.”

Here you are.

What lesson are you teaching your kids … that money is more important than your health?

Sue, it’s time for a little drilling: you’re a professional couple with over a million dollars in assets, but you can’t pay for your health?

If I were in your situation I’d sell one of your investment properties.

Pay the damn capital gains.

Pay for the dental work.

Maybe give yourself some breathing room so you don’t feel so stressed all the time.

Smile.

You deserve it.

Two padlocks

I've been thinking about putting a padlock on my diesel tank.

"Do it," urged Kathryn, my personal assistant. "Diesel's going to four dollars a litre."

She showed me texts from mates driving around Lancefield trying to stockpile diesel in 44-gallon drums.

 
Wait, why are people prepping?

Well, maybe because they listened to Energy Minister Chris Bowen, a man who believes in hot air and wind, who assured us this week:

"There is no need for panic buying."

Better make it two padlocks.

It's easy to write this off as the toilet paper panic of 2020, except this time the thing running out actually runs everything.

The Strait of Hormuz is a sliver of water between Iran and Oman, two places most Aussies would struggle to find on a map. Still, it carries 20 per cent of the world's oil. That makes it the jugular of the global economy, and right now someone has their hands around it.

Here's how it hits farmers like me:

When oil prices surge, the tanker that rolls up my driveway to fill my diesel tank costs more. So farmers swear a lot. The fertiliser to grow the food is already up 30 per cent. So farmers swear some more. The truckie who moves the harvest needs to charge more. By the time your food hits the shelf, every single hand that touched it paid more to do it. That's inflation.

Here's how it hits you:

Prices are already rising at 3.8 per cent — well above the RBA's 2 to 3 per cent target. Higher oil prices push that higher. Higher inflation means the Reserve Bank reaches for interest rates. So if you've got a mortgage, that distant rumble you can hear?

That's not thunder.

My wife, meanwhile, has moved on.

She test drove a new electric car this week. We've got solar on the roof, and a battery going in soon. We drove past a servo on the way home.

Diesel: $2.60 a litre.

She didn't even notice.

Felt good!

Tread Your Own Path!

Have You Checked Your Super Lately?

Hi Scott,

I read your column about Mary (“I’m Still Standing”), who lost the majority of her lifetime super savings through the First Guardian Master Fund collapse.

I’m the government-appointed CEO of the Compensation Scheme of Last Resort.

Around 12,000 people were impacted by Shield and First Guardian, but only 2,000 have lodged complaints with the Australian Financial Complaints Authority (AFCA). What happened to the other 10,000? 

If you received dodgy advice, you may be eligible for compensation. Lodge a complaint with AFCA. And encourage everyone to check their super balance now! Love your work. Keep giving the bad guys a hard time.

David Berry, CEO, Compensation Scheme of Last Resort

Hi David,

Your job is to compensate Aussies who have received dodgy financial advice?

Bloody hell, you’d be busier than TAL’s funeral insurance public relations team.

Here’s my best guess on where those 10,000 missing victims are:

They have no idea it happened.

The vast majority of people who got screwed innocently clicked on a Facebook ad offering a free super comparison or review. They were taken to a page that asked for their phone number. Then a smooth-talking spiv convinced them to move their super into a dog-turd super fund. 

Then their money went ‘poof’!

And here’s the thing about super: it’s the one account we never check. It just sits there while we get on with life. Which is exactly what these crooks were counting on.

So let’s give a brother a hand.

There are a couple of million Barefooters reading these words right now.

So I have a favour to ask of you.

If you, or someone you love, ever clicked on a social media ad and switched your super, or if a financial advisor has switched you into a super fund, go here right now to find out if you’re affected:

takeyoursuperback.com/ 

The Worst Car Loan Ever?

Hi Scott,

My nephew borrowed $51,681 from ‘Infinity Finance’ for a car at 18.35% interest. After 12 months of paying $1,327 monthly (that’s nearly $16,000 paid), he came into some money and asked for an early payout figure. They said he owes $53,511 – that’s nearly $2,000 MORE than he originally borrowed. They’ve given him seven days to ‘take it or leave it’. Is there any world in which this is legal? What do we do?

Aunty Pat

Hi Aunty Pat,

Your nephew has just learned the most expensive lesson an 18-year-old can learn:

Don’t swim with sharks.

Let’s look at the maths:

He borrowed $51,681.

He’s already paid almost $16,000.

And after a full year of repayments … they say he still owes $53,511?

Bloody hell.

Now, how does that happen?

Simple. These lenders pile on things like early termination fees, establishment fees, monthly account fees, and interest that compounds faster than rabbits. It’s all buried in the fine print.

If he keeps the loan, he’ll end up paying close to $70,000 for a car that’s probably worth $35,000 today. Half his money. Incinerated.

So here’s what you should do:

Tell him to prepare himself for a bit of biffo.

He’s about to scrap with a company whose entire business model depends on 18-year-olds not reading the fine print. So he should call the National Debt Helpline on 1800 007 007 and get a free financial counsellor in his corner.

His first punch is to call Infinity Finance and tell them he’s disputing the loan on responsible lending grounds. An 18-year-old, fifty grand, 18 percent?! That’s got ‘Barefoot Investor national newspaper article’ written all over it.

Then throw a hook: while he’s got them on the phone, make them a ‘full and final’ settlement offer well below their payout figure. I’d open at $45,000.

However, I’m guessing these guys don’t mind a scrap and they love their money, so they may well say “bring it on”. If they do, it’s time to go for his knockout punch: lodge a complaint with AFCA (the Australian Financial Complaints Authority). The moment he does, Infinity Finance has to stop any debt collection action. They can’t chase him. They can’t threaten him. They just have to sit there and wait.

Oh, and tell your nephew one more thing from me:

When someone offers a teenager a $50,000 car loan at 18% interest, they’re not selling a car.

They’re selling a life lesson.

Unfortunately, this one costs about $35,000.

Jeffrey Epstein and Vanguard

Scott,

As a mid-life woman, I have been impacted by predatory behaviour in the workplace and I identify strongly with the women who were treated as prey in Epstein’s network. I am really disturbed to read about the links of this network to Vanguard. Are you able to recommend some alternative low-cost ETFs that are more ethical about how they do business, like Future Group, which holds Future Super?

Matilda

Hi Matilda,

Your question made me sweat like Bill Gates.

Jeffrey Epstein is linked to Vanguard?

I couldn’t believe it. This is one of the most boring companies in finance. Its founder, Jack Bogle, was so tight he kept a penny jar by the photocopier.

He must be rolling in his grave right now.

So I took a deep breath, held my nose and googled.

Nothing.

I asked ChatGPT.

Nothing.

So I called Vanguard and asked them point blank.

“Is it true you have links to Jeffrey Epstein?”

“I don’t think so”, came the confused response. “Have you heard otherwise?”

“Well, I got a tip-off from a reader who’d obviously done some serious research ... though it doesn’t appear to be on the internet, or in any newspapers, or anywhere else that I could find.”

And as I said that, I realised something.

Research isn’t really your thing, is it Matilda?

Because if it were, you would have also googled the ‘ethical’ alternative you recommended to me, Future Super. 

Here’s what I found when I did:

It seems Future Super has its own problems: greenwashing allegations, high fees – and ASIC fined them for misleading marketing in 2023. So your ‘ethical’ alternative has about as much credibility as Elon Musk’s email to Epstein on Christmas morning asking for an invite to one of his parties (google it).

Matilda, the whole Epstein tragedy is about innocent young women giving their trust to people who hadn’t earned it, and didn’t deserve it. Don’t make the same mistake with your money.

Ding Ding Ding

“The unfolding war in Iran took a deadly turn today …” squawked the radio in my ute.

I glanced at my son in the rear-view mirror, strapped into his booster seat, and switched it off.

We had business to attend to.

“Were here, mate,” I said, without needing to.

He was already wriggling out of his booster seat like a magician escaping a straitjacket.

For a brief moment we stood holding hands, watching a giant conveyor belt swallow empty bottles one by one.

Every time it swallowed one:

‘Ding.’

Ten cents.

‘Ding. Ding. Ding.’

Forty cents flashed on the analogue scoreboard.

Something stirred inside me that I genuinely cannot explain. I am a grown man. I have written books about money. But standing there at that collection depot with my five-year-old son, I felt five years old myself.

My mind started racing. We should go to Bunnings and get one of those Gorilla trailers. We could raid Romsey for every yellow bin in sight and make out like bandits.

DING!

My son felt it too. He squeezed my hand and then began shovelling bottles like he was feeding one of his hungry orphan pet lambs.

I told one of my newspaper editors about it. She went to the tip recently herself, fresh off a camping trip that was apparently very well hydrated. She fed the machine for twenty minutes and walked away with twelve bucks.

“All that work,” she said. “For twelve dollars.”

Same machine. Same ding. Completely different reaction.

We heard treasure. She heard an hourly rate.

And that's the shift: at some point money stops feeling like treasure and starts feeling like homework. The numbers get bigger. The feeling gets smaller.

The first dollar you ever earned felt like all the money on earth. You remember it. Today your mortgage repayment does not feel like anything, even if it’s the smartest financial move you’ve ever made.

I’m not saying go fossick for bottles. I’m saying if the only time your kids ever see you with money is when you’re paying bills and sighing, that’s the story they’ll grow up believing.

They’re watching how you feel about it.

My son collected forty-three bottles. He made $4.30.

“This was the best day,” he said on the drive home.

The radio stayed off.

Tread Your Own Path!

I’m Disappointed in You, Barefoot

Scott,

I was disappointed with your response to the teacher last week. Why not provide a real solution when you are asked? The ASX School trading game is a lot of fun and can be done in a safe way to encourage kids to get a taste of investing. I would have thought you would jump at sharing a low cost, safe way to learn how to invest.

Denise

Hi Denise,

The ASX school trading game is, in my view, redic-or-us.

Students get a virtual $50,000 and have 10 weeks to trade stocks throughout the school day.

What does that teach kids?

That investing is basically gambling. Just without the sports.

That is monumentally wrong. It’s dangerous. It’s poisonous. After all, if investing were a 10-week sprint, Warren Buffett would’ve retired at 14.

The ASX should shut it down and leave the gambling grooming to Sportsbet.

The best way to learn to invest is to actually do it. Take some pocket money — as little as $25 — and put it into a low-cost index fund. Google “kids investing app” and you’ll find plenty of options.

At the same time, plant an apple tree in the backyard.

Watch both grow.

That’s investing.

I’m Still Standing

Dear Scott,

I’m writing to you because I need a little hope.

I’m 56 years old, single, and the sole supporter of myself. I have worked two to three jobs at a time all of my adult life, always believing that if I worked hard and did the right thing then my superannuation would be there to support me in later years.

Unfortunately, due to the failure of the First Guardian Master Fund, I have lost the majority of my lifetime superannuation savings. I now have approximately $13,000 remaining in super, and I am extremely concerned about my financial wellbeing as I approach retirement age with no partner, no safety net, and no ability to rely on anyone else.

I am not looking for sympathy, I’m looking for practical, realistic advice. I want to know what is still possible at my age. Whether rebuilding some level of super is achievable, what the smartest use of my limited income might be, and how to protect myself from making any further mistakes.

I have always been responsible, hardworking, and willing to do what it takes. I just feel overwhelmed and unsure where to start now, particularly after such a devastating loss late in life. Your work has helped so many Australians feel less ashamed and more empowered about money, and that is why I felt brave enough to reach out. Even a small amount of guidance or direction would mean more than I can properly express.

Mary

Mary,

You are a rolled-gold winner.

You have every reason to play the victim. Your retirement savings are gone. Yet you’re writing to me about hope?

That tells me everything I need to know about you.

However, hope isn’t a strategy.

We attack.

First: I’m putting you in touch with a lawyer already across this issue. If there’s money to be clawed back, we claw it back.

Second: you’ve got roughly ten working years left.

Here’s the rebuild:

Move your super to a low-cost industry fund or Vanguard super index fund. Salary sacrifice like your retirement depends on it. Take advantage of the ‘free money’ co-contribution scheme. Keep fees tiny.

Boring and relentless is where the magic happens.

And understand this: retirement isn’t a cliff. It’s a gradual slope. Part-time work. Flexible income. Super plus the Age Pension. That combination works.

You are not starting from zero.

You are starting with grit, discipline and ten more years of earning power.

That’s enough.

Now go build it.

I Thought I Was Really Clever … Now My Wife is FURIOUS

Hi Scott,

I thought I was really clever when I started buying silver and gold about nine months ago. I bought the silver outright and the gold through a saver account with a reputable dealer. I’ve ferreted away a few grand and put $13,000 against our home loan – which had zero owing before I did this. I’ve put in $17,000, and our silver and gold is now worth about $30,000. I told my wife earlier this week and showed her the physical gold and silver. She was ropeable.

Before you say I should have included her: I’ve tried Barefoot Date Nights but she’s never shown any interest, too busy with kids, etc. Everything gets paid and she has enough money for groceries, nights out with the girls, and whatever she wants. But she’s furious. I thought she’d be rapt that I did something smart. 

Now she doesn’t want to hear about it. I want to double down and buy more, but she won’t even comment. We have a $200,000 investment loan for ETFs which has done nothing for two years – only up about $8,000. What should I do? Sell enough to clear the $13,000? Hold the silver? Sell the ETF and buy heaps more silver? Change my super to an SMSF and buy gold?

Ben

Dude,

Dude.

Duuuuude.

Your wife isn’t furious about the shiny metals.

She’s furious because you went behind her back and pulled $13,000 from the family home loan without telling her. Then you unveiled it like a kid at show-and-tell who’d found $10 in a carpark.

You didn’t include her – but you expected applause?

Truthfully?

You got lucky. Gold has had an incredible run. And now you’re asking whether to double down, drain the ETFs and restructure your super … while your wife won’t talk to you.

That’s your answer right there.

The investment question is easy. The marriage question is the one you’re ignoring. So, book the Barefoot Date Night. Not to explain silver … to actually listen to her.

Because right now you’ve got $30,000 in precious metals and a wife who doesn’t trust you.

I know which one I’d rather have.

My view?

Sell the metals. Clear the home loan. Then have the conversation you should have had nine months ago.

Canberra called (I said NO)

"You've been invited to Canberra this week to attend a Senate inquiry," announced my PA, Kathryn.

"Let me think about that," I replied.

Pause.

"Actually ... I'd rather buy funeral insurance."

This inquiry would be like a tacky theatre restaurant, except the waiters are on $180,000 and the ending has already been rehearsed.

The topic?

Reducing the Capital Gains Tax discount for property investors.

So here's what I'd say if I went, which is precisely why I won't:

"I strongly encourage you to pass laws that will make the value of my house go down."

Can you imagine the headlines?

"BAREFOOT INVESTOR PLEADS: 'MAKE ME POOR!'"

And I mean it.

Right now I get a 50 percent discount on the tax I pay when I sell an investment property. Meanwhile, Kathryn pays full freight on every dollar she earns answering my emails.

She's 32. Still living with her mum. Jokes about putting a tiny house on my back paddock.

She's not joking.

Two-thirds of voters own homes. Politicians know the maths. So they won't say this out loud: the tax system props up the housing market. It rewards people who already got in.

Cut the discount and politicians get to look brave. They get to say they've "taken on investors." And Canberra pockets more tax. 

Beautiful.

But don't let them keep it. Instead, use it to lower income taxes. Stop taxing effort harder than a property gain.

Cut the discount.

My property drops in value? I'll cope.

Kathryn gets a shot at a roof over her head, and keeps more of her pay?

Worth it.

Tread Your Own Path!

Funeral Insurer TAL Kills Off Husband

Hi Scott,

Thank you for taking on Bill and Wendy’s funeral insurance nightmare last week. My mum died last year. That’s when I discovered she’d been paying funeral insurance for decades – I think she paid for her funeral twenty times over. She wanted “a very simple affair”. Instead, the insurance company got rich. How many other families are discovering this after their parents die?

Tash

Hi Tash,

I’m sorry for the loss of your mum, and your mum’s loss.

How many elderly people are stuck in this trap?

The insurers won’t tell us, but I suspect it’s in the (many) thousands.

This week Wendy called me in a bit of a flap.

“Scott, I just received an email from TAL telling me how sad they are that Bill died.”

Bill has not one but two terminal diagnoses.

Now imagine your wife of 60 years opening that email.

Getting paid out the benefit automatically triggered a “we care deeply” templated email from TAL – the same company that’s been bleeding them dry for years with a funeral insurance policy they should never have sold in the first place.

Still, when big companies are this stupid, you have to laugh.

“Wendy, please go give Bill a prod for me … make sure the old bugger is still with us”, I joked.

She put down the phone for a moment.

“Yes, he’s watching a movie. Very much alive”, she laughed.

Big companies do dumb things. Their systems and processes – and profit targets – blind them from behaving like decent humans. They forget that those profits come from someone’s scared grandparent. 

TAL don’t need their money.They just want it.