Help, My Husband’s a Hoarder!

Question


I just finished my first Barefoot Date Night with my hubby. My problem is that he is a hoarder, and the look on his face when he heard your advice about selling our stuff on Gumtree was nothing less than horror. And without selling a heap of stuff there is no way we will have a Mojo account. He earns way more than I do (as I have gone back to university) and I have already sold most of my stuff to pay for textbooks and such. What should I do?

Lee

Scott's Answer


Hi Lee,

So what you’re saying is “with my drop in income I feel vulnerable, and I want some financial security”.

And what your husband is saying is “I don’t really care”.

Is that too harsh?

Probably (especially if he’s actually got a thing for hoarding).

I’m sure he does care … he just doesn’t need to think too deeply about it, because you keep things separate. He may not even realise you’ve had to sell some of your stuff to buy your university books.

Yet this approach isn’t working for you now, and it won’t help you achieve your joint life goals.

So if I were in your shoes I’d have another Date Night and put the issue fair and square on the menu:

As a couple, what do we value more: our stuff or our financial security?

Scott