Message in a Bottle

Dear Mr Pape,

I have $10,000 in a bottle buried for my only granddaughter, who is two. I want to buy her a car when she turns 18, but I may not be here by then as I am nearly 68, and I also realise it will not be worth much by then. I would like to know how I could grow it better. 

Loving granny, Mary

Hi Granny,

Money in a bottle?

That reminds me of a guy I know who does a lot of cash jobs. Over the years, he has buried some of this cash in his large yard. Yet one day he went to dig it up and, lo and behold, he’d forgotten where he’d buried it.

So he got what he uncharitably called a ‘yokel’ (local) to find it for him, being careful to describe it as “just an old box of papers”.

“I’ll pay you ten bucks an hour … but no bloody lunch breaks!” he snarled, as he left in the morning in his Merc.

That evening when he returned home, he couldn’t believe his eyes: the yokel had dug up every inch of his expensively landscaped yard. Seriously, there were more craters in it than the moon. And yet, despite his hard work, the poor yokel never did find the box. (Or so he said.) True story!

And the moral of the story is that keeping your money in a bottle is not a good idea. You have 16 years to grow it: I’d suggest thinking about investing it in the share market via a low-cost fund. You may also want to investigate a share investment bond, which allows you to nominate what age your granddaughter can receive the money, and for what purpose. Do that and the only bottle you’ll have to focus on is champagne at your granddaughter’s 18th.

Scott