This is going to hurt

This week, I found myself standing in my underwear while a man took photos of me.
 
“Oh, this doesn’t look good” he said, getting right up in my grill. “Best we freeze this sunspot off,” said my doctor, walking back to his desk.
 
He returned with a giant metal canister and pointed it at my temple, Terminator style.
 
“This … is going to hurt”, he said matter of factly.
 
“Hey! You are not supposed to say that!” I protested.

Yet it was too late. I felt a stinging sensation for a couple of seconds … and then it was all over.
 
Contrast this approach to that of another doctor – our Federal Treasurer, Dr Jim Chalmers.
 
(He’s not a medical doctor, he’s a doctor of political science … in other words, he’s a spin-doctor).
 
In the past few weeks the Treasurer has thrown a little bit of inner Karen at the Reserve Bank, whining that they are ‘smashing the economy’ by their decision not to cut interest rates.
 
I actually agree with Jim.  
 
There is no doubt that interest rates are hurting our economy, just as they are in other parts of the world, like the United States, the United Kingdom and New Zealand, all of which, it has to be said, have higher rates than us right now.
 
Having said that, the Treasurer is doing the equivalent of protesting against a sting on the side of the forehead, while the Reserve Bank is focused on eliminating a potentially cancerous melanoma … in the form of entrenched inflation.
 
As we’ve experienced since Covid, the effects of runaway inflation are cancerous to the economy … and they hurt people on the lowest incomes the most.
 
So now I’m going to pick up a giant metal canister and aim it at your temple:
 
Too many people (and journalists!) have anchored their expectations to ultra-low interest rates. It’s high time we pulled up that anchor and sailed into the sea of sustained higher rates.
 
(And to be clear, I expect them to be consistently higher than we’ve experienced in the past few years, whether it’s Labor, the Coalition or the Breakdancing Party – don’t discount her: Raygun has better name recognition than Albo or Whatshisname).
 
Last week, RBA Governor Michele Bullock spoke about the small number of borrowers who can’t make ends meet, suggesting that some “may ultimately make the difficult decision to sell their homes”.
 
That’s the “this is going to hurt” line my doctor gave me. Which is a ballsy thing to say in her position, but also good advice: if I had a dollar for every time I’d told people in financial stress that they need to consider selling their home, I could rent a house in Ouyen (for a week).
 
Yet, as a spin doctor (especially one on the eve of an election), Jim sadly can’t say that. Still, if the thought of that causes you heart palpitations, right now is a very good time to get a financial check-up!
 
Tread Your Own Path!

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