What Is Wonder Woman Worth?

Scott,
 
I’m wondering what your thoughts are around the hourly rate for a stay-at-home parent? I am unable to go back to work while we have young kids at home, one of whom has a chronic illness. My wonderful partner is supporting the family on his income. Although being the main caregiver is one of life’s most important jobs, it is seriously undervalued and underpaid. If I were to get paid a wage, what would it be?
 
Wonder Woman (aka a mum)
 
Hi Wonder Woman,
 
My wife Liz left me last week.
 
She’s flown to Europe to produce a documentary for the next three weeks (“or so”). In the lead-up to her departure she sat me down and took me through what I call ‘Liz-gistics’:
 
It’s an actual spreadsheet that tracks the movements of our four kids. When I put all their activities into my calendar it honestly looks like a failed game of Tetris. The next few weeks are absolutely terrifying.
 
So, how much is a stay-at-home parent worth?
 
Well, I went looking and found a study by salary.com which calculated that stay-at-home mums work a whopping 96 hours a week, and therefore it says they should earn at least $230,000 a year. Yet that all sounds kinda clickbaity and not particularly useful.
 
Look, the home is not a workplace. If it were, I’d have taken my three-year-old to HR for verbal bullying, harassment and workplace assault after he threw his Vegemite toast at me because I mistakenly cut it into squares rather than halves.
 
My simple answer to your question is that you and your partner should share the money that comes into the family, based on the family money buckets you’ve set up.
 
However, and this is important, part of that set-up should include individual Splurge buckets: a set amount that you can enjoy without judgement or guilt from the other.
 
Oh, and you should also have a family Smile bucket so you can jointly save up for things that you’ll enjoy as a family. Working together is how you win.

-Scott.